Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
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