you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
