Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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