Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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