is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
