Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(678): View more from Georgia

Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,

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(815): View more from Illinois

Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams

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(540): View more from Virginia

i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing

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(630): View more from Illinois

Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?

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(435): View more from Utah

Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.

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(816): View more from Missouri

So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta

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(602): View more from Arizona

I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am

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(775): View more from Nevada

His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.

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