Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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