I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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