Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
