What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
