just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
they're like a gay fantastic four
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
It's no shave November. This is our time.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
