I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
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