You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
