I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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