I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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