Just cropdusted the office
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
