So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
