He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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