Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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