1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
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