i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize