i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
