I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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