finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
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