I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I deserve this hangover.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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