If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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