Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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