Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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