Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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