once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
