so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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