At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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