Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
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