I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Just high enough for therapy.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
