there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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