went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
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