'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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