I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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