Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
