She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Randomize
