I hope mine doesn't look like that
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
Randomize
