You really coming over, don't trick.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Your topless pictures make me question reality
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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