you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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