she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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