We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize