dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
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