Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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