i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
