Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Did you pee in the oven last night??
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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