This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize