Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize